There was 54 boxes of textile items gathered from our home after the fire. Though that is not a lot of stuff for a family of eleven, I felt it was a lot for me to embark upon by myself. I remember the day the cleaners came to bring me what I thought would be a few boxes of clothes that were salvaged from the fire and they showed up in a truck filled with boxes of stuff, anything thing made of cloth or material i.e. clothes, shoes, linens, rugs etc.; I was overwhelmed unto tears. My desire at the time was simply to obtain our clothes that we could have what we needed without buying or seeking them from others. After opening a couple of boxes with a friend and finding that there were items that still smelled like smoke as well as items that were damaged, I decided to put them to the side until after the holidays, at least that's what I thought.
After the holidays passed, I realized I needed to go through those boxes to get an idea of what had been gathered, what was missing and what we would have need of replacing for the days to come. Opening up those boxes was like opening the door to a portion of my heart where a bit of uncertainty and sadness had made a home. I didn't realize I had those feelings, but God knew.
Last weekend, He met me as I looked through the boxes, I felt an unwillingness to embrace what was mine...what was ours, also a bit of grief of our loss and finally I had thoughts of gratefulness unto Him for being O so good to us. He saved us, each and everyone of us from hurt, harm and danger that morning and he was even so kind as to save some of our belongings. He spoke to my heart and let me know it was okay to embrace that which remained and to let go of that which was lost for He purposed it to be so. Again, He reminded me that he is my provider and in my heart I felt a sense of relief.
On Monday, I met reluctance and did not go through more boxes as I had planned. As I slept Monday night, God ministered to my heart and soul. He woke me up early Tuesday morning and gave me the strength and ambition to complete the task. I was not alone, He directed me and I sorted, purged and packed until I was done; my heart was full of joy for I knew I had just overcome with Him. Throughout the day He continued to enlighten me of the burden I had been carrying and He gave me insight as to how He had been carrying me, carrying us in the midst.
All I can say is "He is good, O so good to me". He knows me and He cares about that which concerns me, yes ME! Our God is an awesome creator; He made me who I am and He chooses to embrace me and display His goodness unto me. How has God revealed himself to you this week?