Thank the Lord for Thursdays!

I am sitting here on Friday afternoon thanking God for the date I had with my husband last night...dinner by candle light!

I can not say that our marriage has been without frustrations and disappointments nor can I say that there haven't been times when I have wanted to give up.  What I can say is that I sought the Lord for my husband and He opened my eyes and my heart to Walter Bowie and confirmed in me His will for us to marry.  Since that day, I have been dedicated to loving him with all of my heart, second only to the Lord.

Along our journey we have been blessed with 10 beautiful children who I love dearly, but nothing like the love I have for Walter.  My love for him is deep; I made a covenant to be his bride unto death not only unto him, but unto our Lord and that is what bind us.  Through good, bad and indifferent my heart yearns to be right with him, I love him so.

It has been so good to have a love like this, especially as I go through the seasons of life as a mother of many, grandma, friend, servant of the Lord etc. The tragedy of the fire has brought unto me the reality that life as we know it this moment is not promised and that having a marriage with Christ as the foundation is must.  Life situations and circumstances are that which test your faith and that which can destroy marriages.  I refuse to allow that to happen to us and thus I choose to cling to God and cling to Walter.

One of the blessings of our marriage has been our commitment to have a date every Thursday.  We have not allowed finances, pregnancies :), indifference nor tragedy keep us from this special time. We have kept it simple yet intimate...dinner and a movie together in the "Love Nest" (our bedroom).  It is not a time for the discussions of life, but a time to be "together".  Now, I must say that there have been times that we have come together with indifference and one or both of us have had little or nothing to say, but we met just the same and were blessed in the midst.

When we made the commitment to have a date on Thursday over 14 years ago little did we know it would be such a blessing to us, but God did!  At times it has been the anchor that has kept our ship from drifting away from God.  For me some weeks it is my motivation to make it through one more day for I know Thursday is coming and at other times I have looked forward to it that it would rekindle the fire that was seemingly burning out.  Walter and I  both agree that God has blessed us tremendously through this commitment and for that we are grateful.

We Walk by Faith

 

The need to reconstruct our home has presented us with an opportunity to expand our home to accommodate our growing (in stature) family.  As a homeschooling family of ten, consisting of seven growing boys who are at home most of everyday, we have need of more space in our house.  When considering this opportunity, reality presented itself...it takes money to expand.

With that reality in mind, we sought the Lord and He gave Walter and I peace about our desire to expand and then a floor plan which includes a bigger bedroom for our seven boys, a bigger kitchen and a bigger schoolroom allowing us to have more space in some very important areas of our home.   When presenting our expansion plan to the builder, he came back with what was a good quote, but it was well beyond our pockets, be it we had not planned to incur such an expense.  Walter and I were both disappointed, unto tears.  So, we went back to the Lord for wisdom and we decided to make a sacrifice and put the compensation we will receive from the insurance company for the contents of our home towards the reconstruction of our home and trust God to provide the furniture, appliances and household items we will need to return to our home. We both have faith that God will supply our every need.

In taking this step of faith, I made a list of our needs including the cost of these items and presented it to God.  He revealed to me that additional debt was not an option, but instead humbling ourselves before Him and others and willing accepting  things from  friends, family etc. as well as choosing to shop for clearance items and gently used items from resale shops to replace the contents of our home is the plan.  I trust God; for truly He is our provider and our sustainer.   We shared our decision with our children since they too will be making a sacrifice of not having things replaced that they once had; we are all at peace and excited to watch God do what He does...provide, for He has not forsaken us.

"Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart . . . I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread."
Psalms 37:4, 25, KJV

Reflecting on His Favor

This has been an emotional couple of weeks for me, personally and I am amazed at the goodness and favor of the Lord. My faith has increased due to the tragedy of this fire; I have sought the Lord in a different way for I was at a loss and didn't even know how to begin such tasks. I have been totally dependent on Him for wisdom and power to see me through.  Getting the process of the restoration and reconstruction moving while caring for our family was all so much to handle...but God was gracious.

I can't say enough about His lovingkindness unto me; He has been an ever present help in the time of trouble.  The greatest task was that of reviewing and recollecting the contents of our home and gathering prices to assure proper compensation of our belongings. Though I knew it was my job as helpmeet to Walter and administrator of our home, frankly I could not do it on my own, I needed help...divine help.  Daily, I sought the Lord with sincerity, every step of the way and His comforting presence was ever so apparent to me.

God was no shorter than His Word, I asked for wisdom and He gave me wisdom...liberally, clearly and precisely.  I know it was Him for I had no knowledge or experience to lead me through the pages and pages of information to be considered and the decisions needed to be made.  The Lord gave me peace as we (He and I) visited our belongings and met with the insurance representative.  He put the words in my mouth that I would ask the questions necessary; He even put sweet words of compassion in the mouths of those who dealt with me regarding our belongings.  One might think, "maybe it is just a good company that you are dealing with", maybe that is so, but He gave me favor each time I had to return to the restoration company as well as when dealing with our insurance representative.  I met no opposition, contention nor confusion, instead I was shown empathy and respect.  His grace and mercy have covered me. I am grateful for such favor from the Lord!  By His grace I have completed the tasks regarding the contents of our home.  We now know the bulk of our loss and what our immediate needs are as well as what the major needs are for returning to our home. Thank you, Lord!

God's Mercy and Love for the Bowie Babies

"The Lord is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion.  The Lord protects the simplehearted; when I was in great need, he saved me.  Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you."  Psalm 116: 5-6
 

It is because of His mercy that we are not consumed; He protected us and has provided rest and peace for our souls.  I am so grateful to share that through it all our children are doing well; the Lord has been good to the Bowie Babies!  God's grace has been abundant unto us; He chose to deliver our family from physical danger during our November 4th house fire.  We experienced no smoke inhalation, nor did we feel the heat of the flames...only God! We were able to escape together and have been blessed to remain together as a family from the moment we had to leave our home giving Walter and I the opportunity to observe and nurture each of our children continually through this tragic event.

God has extended us much mercy and love as not one of them have displayed any overwhelming fear, anxiety or depression as a result of the events of the fire. We have had many open conversations about our loss with the children, individually as well as collectively.  Thus far, they appear to be blessed abundantly with peace through the process. I have seen them lean and depend upon one another a lot and share much understanding and empathy amongst them.

They have been sibling, friend and confidant to each other. The first few weeks were roughest; they shared very limited living space with very few options to retreat unto oneself. They had no clothes and none of their personal belongings, but they did have each other and it was apparent that that gave each of them much comfort.  As the days multiplied they showed little concern over the loss of their stuff, but definitely a longing for home.

Moving to the temporary house has been a blessing as it has given them space and a place to call home. It has also given them room to indulge in their passions i.e. weight lifting, painting, videography etc., room to think and reflect..room to grow.  Though it is sometimes difficult for me, our return to a daily routine of home schooling, weekly church service and even participation in winter basketball has given them a sense of normalcy and an opportunity to walk along this journey looking forward instead of looking back at their loss and being overwhelmed with grief.

Each of them have changed so much in the past three months and by God's grace they appear to healthy and whole, physically, mentally and spiritually.  Daily, I hear them speak about what they miss about home and that they look forward to returning home and daily I see God's mercy, grace and love right before my eyes...for He continues to give each of them peace and a sound mind.  Thank you, Lord for protection and rest along the way; You have been good to us!

His Goodness

There was 54 boxes of textile items gathered from our home after the fire. Though that is not a lot of stuff for a family of eleven, I felt it was a lot for me to embark upon by myself.  I remember the day the cleaners came to bring me what I thought would be a few boxes of clothes that were salvaged from the fire and they showed up in a truck filled with boxes of stuff, anything thing made of cloth or material i.e. clothes, shoes, linens, rugs etc.; I was overwhelmed unto tears.  My desire at the time was simply to obtain our clothes that we could have what we needed without buying or seeking them from others.  After opening a couple of boxes with a friend and finding that there were items that still smelled like smoke as well as items that were damaged, I decided to put them to the side until after the holidays, at least that's what I thought.

After the holidays passed, I realized I needed to go through those boxes to get an idea of what had been gathered, what was missing and what we would have need of replacing for the days to come.  Opening up those boxes was like opening the door to a portion of my heart where a bit of uncertainty and sadness had made a home.  I didn't realize I had those feelings, but God knew.

Last weekend, He met me as I looked through the boxes, I felt an unwillingness to embrace what was mine...what was ours, also a bit of grief of our loss and finally I had thoughts of gratefulness unto Him for being O so good to us.  He saved us, each and everyone of us from hurt, harm and danger that morning and he was even so kind as to save some of our belongings.  He spoke to my heart and let me know it was okay to embrace that which remained and to let go of that which was lost for He purposed it to be so.  Again, He reminded me that he is my provider and in my heart I felt a sense of relief.

On Monday, I met reluctance and did not go through more boxes as I had planned.  As I slept Monday night, God ministered to my heart and soul. He woke me up early Tuesday morning and gave me the strength and ambition to complete the task.  I was not alone, He directed me and I sorted, purged and packed until I was done; my heart was full of joy for I knew I had just overcome with Him. Throughout the day He continued to enlighten me of the burden I had been carrying and He gave me insight as to how He had been carrying me, carrying us in the midst.

All I can say is "He is good, O so good to me".  He knows me and He cares about that which concerns me, yes ME!  Our God is an awesome creator; He made me who I am and He chooses to embrace me and display His goodness unto me.  How has God revealed himself to you this week?